Graters are not so great….

Some things were just not designed with the welfare of the user in mind. Here are just a few to mull on…

What do you see above?  A fairly standard cheese and veggie grater.  Surely if I want extra protein with my grated potatoes or carrots I could add some fish or chicken, rather than raw grated finger skin? Maybe it resembles Thai red sauce, but it’s ersatz.  By the time you get to the end of a slippery potato, you have to be pretty thick-skinned if you haven’t sustained some minor collateral damage to your patiently guiding fingers.

Onions are the worst.  Try grating an onion, as slippery as a greased eel, while preventing tears from your eyes to add to the little red droplets that begin to form when nearly all the layers of the bulb have been duly grated and the stubborn last bits remain.

I guess some of the red faced, aproned “big mamas” and cooks of the past developed hidebound hands.  After all, these hands were in all likelihood used to smack unruly behinds when a sly little hand slipped into the cookie jar…

https://i1.wp.com/www.simplydoorhandles.co.uk/ProdImages/xl_ZB012.jpg

What do you see above?  I see a device generally known as a “door handle” specially designed to catch sleeves.  They are usually at just the right height and position to briefly trap sleeves as if in ambush.  Quite often I’ve been the victim of such ambushes, sometimes resulting in a torn sleeve or ripped-off button.  I much prefer the below version, usually called a “door knob“:

https://i0.wp.com/www.homesteadhardware.com/images/emtek/brass-door-knobs/emtek-brass-rope-door-knob-lg.jpg

https://i2.wp.com/www.truth-out.org/sitefiles/021212water.jpg

Seen above is a device that can take various forms, but with the same message:

Don’t touch my holy water!

As a runner, I often bypass several of these locked taps before finding one which can be used for a quick refreshing few mouthfuls of fresh water.

We already have so many keys for everything, and this means that a householder with a locked tap and a tight schedule has to search for yet another pesky key on the occasions when he or she wishes to sprinkle the wilting petunias at the end of a warm day.  I admit their motive is not to deter runners or cyclists but to foil water thieves or prevent the theft of the tap itself, but when you’re nowhere near a service station and find one of these get lost devices, you get the impression that some paranoid person may be in the house, armed with a rifle strategically poised on a stockpile of baked beans. Maybe they drive cars with a high carbon footprint, barely avoid grannies while aggressively pushing their shopping trolley, and subscribe to as many conspiracy theories as possible…

On the other hand, householders with usable water may be perceived as people who have a birdbath which is regularly refilled, swerve to avoid frogs, subscribe to Garden and Home and never drive Hummers.

Maybe not an accurate picture, but fun to speculate on when you’ve developed a thirst from tramping too much tar…

People that don’t indicate when turning… another thing I could do without…

A good proportion of motorists never use a device called indicators or flicker lights.  Even when in a turning land, which leads to the impression that wither they haven’t seen the turning lane, or intend to drive straight on into the sport field just ahead.  It can really confuse other road users such as mere runners or cyclists when some apparent secret agent assumes that everyone knows which way he’s going.  Some people only use their flicker lights when changing lanes, but not when they want to turn left or right…

Sometimes I’d like to throw a cheese grater at them.

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Published by: envirozentinel63

Diagnosed with asperger syndrome. Keen runner and writer who wants to share the ups and downs of all my many experiences and maybe reach out to someone who needs encouragement.

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